Chukwuneta Oby; tingles@punchng.com’ 08139149577 (SMS only)
Although, I learnt the pastor in question has stepped down from his exalted position in the church,
That may not be the end of the matter…as JUSTICE is being pushed (by many) to take its course over an incident that took place 20 years ago.
The wife of a known artist has accused a popular Abuja pastor of raping her when she was just a minor.
The man has refuted the claim but I am most convinced that people will not be as ‘understanding’ with their emotions over the matter…considering that the same pastor was publicly fingered a few years back in a ‘sex story’ by another female.
The most important lesson to learn from all this is that… no ‘carelessness’ or misdeed is too insignificant to bring down anybody.
As ‘booming’ a sound as the first allegation against the pastor made was, it died down as quickly as the dust it raised…not minding that it was allegedly an affair that wasn’t ‘that long’ ago.
But look how effortlessly a 20-year-old ‘sin’ shook his very core!
Certain misdeeds should NOT be handled as if nothing happened…even if you have ‘repented’.
It won’t do to just walk away from a past misdeed – as if nothing happened.
Some hurts are so deep that nothing short of genuine apology can even begin to scratch the surface of the healing process.
I had expected that certain flashbacks of one’s past misdeeds would jolt ‘the discerning’ into reaching out (to whoever they must have hurt in the past)…with apologies.
Apology is not always enough to heal the broken but it is a strong factor in everyone’s healing journey.
You can’t get to a certain level of answerability and still comfortably sit on grave past misdeeds.
It doesn’t show your repentance is total.
God’s forgiveness doesn’t mean you should sit on your misdeeds.
Reach out for forgiveness from whoever you have hurt (and ‘sin’ no more…most importantly).
…it’s the only way certain hurts can begin to lessen their grip on the victim.
Every healer also needs healing.
This is an environment in which infallibility is automatically ascribed to anybody referred to as a ‘man of God’.
If we really realise that they are just as HUMAN as the rest of us, we will KNOW when a certain conduct is coming from a ‘man of God’ who has not conquered his demons.
Or one who is likely grappling with mental issues, etc.
And needs help!
If we are not busy placing people on a pedestal…they will be less engrossed in keeping a façade and truly seek HELP on their issues.
It’s NOT always fair to place anybody on a pedestal.
Certain expectations stress the ‘human’ in others.
It’s like giving a weary traveller extra loads to carry.
Dear pastors,
Please seek HELP when your thoughts and actions begin to surprise even you.
Nobody is OK at all times.
No amount of being ‘born again’ insulates anybody from human issues.
And issues not sincerely confronted don’t go away.
…same may be your downfall, someday.
Your victim of yesterday may become your nemesis tomorrow.
The ones that are not strong enough to initiate your downfall will aid and abet it.
Nothing motivates like PAIN…especially that of the heart.
Therefore, let nobody rest easy on their wrongdoing against another.
Keep it real.
Certain responsibilities also entail going the extra mile to stay in line…on morality.
You can misbehave today …if only you will be ready to face the consequences tomorrow.
Life doesn’t close its eyes to continued deliberate wrongdoing.
It fights back by exposing such misdeeds…when least expected!
It’s better people begin to live half of what they preach…especially those to whom vulnerable others look up to in salvation or for guidance!
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