Femi Fani-Kayode: Aturu Mulu Ebunu Gba aka Nwa, by Joe Igbokwe


This Igbo song is by a musician from the East which was very popular in the 1960s and 70s. It says that a sheep that gives birth to a ram has no child. This song reminds of what happened in 1976 in my secondary school days. A father brought back his son who was expelled from a school to the principal to discipline. When the man was asked what he expected the principal to do, he said “Oga principal please do whatever you like with this boy. He has brought untold hardship, heartbreak and shame to me”. The next morning during the school assembly, the principal brought the boy before the whole school and with the parents physically present. All his atrocities both in school and at home were narrated to all and sundry. The boy was given 24 strokes of cane and a punishment that would take him a week to accomplish. It made the boy a better student thereafter.

Another case is the story of a young man in Lagos a few years back. The young man was involved in cult activities in school. He was also involved in street gang wars and armed robbery. For years the parents suffered the menace of this young man which involved frequent police raids at their residence, constant harassment from neighbours and sleepless nights. One day, the police invaded the house for yet another arrest of the young man. The father took the police to where the young man was hiding and raised his voice in a thunderous manner, “Please take this young man away and do not allow him to return to this house again”.

I do not know what Fani-Kayode Senior would have done if he were alive to witness what his son is doing to earn a living in Nigeria today. For all the members of the family of the late great Fani power who are alive, I know that the actions and deeds of Femi Fani-Kayode would have been a thorn in their flesh for years now. Aturu mulu ebunu gba aka nwa.

I began to take mental note of Mr. Femi Fani-Kayode (also referred to as FFK) in the days of the locusts, between 1993 and 1998. I think he relocated to Ghana when the heat became unbearable for him. From there he was dishing out articles in support of Chief MKO Abiola. He was fond of quoting the scriptures, and I went away with the thinking that Fani-Kayode must be a pastor. An encounter with him in Abuja when General Obasanjo was the President made me change my mind. I had gone to see Mr. Akin Osuntokun in his office when he was the Managing Director of the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN). Eventually, we met Fani-Kayode somewhere in a hotel in Abuja and from his conduct and utterances, I realised that he had never been a pastor and can never be one till the end of time.

Yes Fani-Kayode served Obasanjo as a minister, but Obasanjo never forgot to tell us that if you want Femi Fani-Kayode to sing for you for years non-stop, just give him money. He later maintained a distance from Obasanjo for something not unconnected with money and sycophancy. He joined APC, but when this ugly interloper and bread-and-butter politician figured, without crosschecking the facts, that the APC might not make it in 2015, he left to serve former President Jonathan as Director of Media and Publicity of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) Presidential Campaign Organisation. Before joining Jonathan, he had taken time to pour invectives on the former president, describing him as clueless, inept and corrupt. What it took for this efulefu to jettison all the allegations and name-calling against Jonathan was simply an appointment and money. That is vintage Femi Fani-Kayode!

Femi Fani-Kayode had fought with the Igbo on several occasions. He had tried to tarnish the image of Mrs. Bianca Ojukwu by telling the world that he once had an intimate relationship with the beauty queen. He has also lampooned the Hausa/Fulani of Nigeria and consequently abused President Buhari on many occasions. Even his kinsmen were not left out of his abusive drivels. Anywhere Fani-Kayode goes he preaches hate, sells arrogance and speaks garbage as a way of life.

I may not know the relationship FFK has now with his immediate family. I may not know his relationship with the Yoruba nation, but I am convinced that nobody takes Fani-Kayode serious any longer. The man has gone full cycle with his scurrilous poppycock and as my people would say, a broken bottle cannot be repaired.

Fani-Kayode thought he could use his mouth to get former President Jonathan and PDP to power but the kite did not fly. The project failed woefully. Now Fani-Kayode has joined those who are still lamenting the loss of the March 28, 2015 presidential election. It is a crushing and dilapidating defeat that shook the world of the Fani-Kayodes and the PDP to its very foundation. As I write, they are yet to come to terms with the tornado and the windstorm that hit them. They wish that Boko Haram will overrun Nigeria so that they can celebrate President Buhari’s failure and prove Jonathan a better former president. They wish that a dollar will sell for N400. They wish that the National Assembly crisis would continue. They wish that implosions should engulf the APC throughout Nigeria. They wish that President Buhari and Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu should be taken to another planet. They wish that Nigeria crashes to the bottomless pit so that they will celebrate, but none of this will happen. APC will cancel what PDP claimed to have achieved in 16 years in four years.

I suggest that Femi Fani-Kayode should grow up. I want this one-time friend of mine to sit down and reflect on his life. My Igbo people would say that, when an old woman falls to the ground two times she is bound to count what is remaining in her basket. I believe that Femi Fani Kayode should be approaching 50 or more than 50. I am told that a fool at forty remains a fool forever. I understand that very soon he will be a grand father, and our culture demands that he should see himself as an elder. St Augustine of Hippo says, “To have ears is not to listen, to listen is not to hear, to hear is not to understand, to understand is not to put into practice”. Ololololo, aturu mulu ebunu gba aka nwa oo, iwoliwo.